Truth, to deceivers of self and others, is a jagged pill. Recently I wrote an article about age-of-consent laws. Therein I talked about the limited efficacy of such laws and, far more importantly, the perils of overly relying on such laws. As an illustration of my point–and to toot my own heroic horn while decrying my family’s apathy/complicity in my current homelessness and the erstwhile theft of my children–I revisited some of the earlier life of my sister, Ingrid, AKA Paris Showers.
Long story short: Ingrid and her husband, Richard, took immense offense to the reality reflected by my article, so much so that the duo collaborated on an email about me to other members of my family (reproduced, in full, at the bottom of the article). The letter is libelous.
Defamation: Libelous when printed, slanderous when spoken
If a private citizens privately engages in libel then that private citizen is privately responsible. However, if a private citizen uses the means of a corporate entity, including a corporate computer andor a corporate-issued email-account, when libeling a private citizen, as was the case when Richard and Ingrid Smith libeled me via Richard.Smith@sharp.com, then the corporate entity, itself, can be legally held liable for the libel, AT LEAST insofar as the corporate entity does not treat its abetting of the crime of libel as a serious breach of procedure, thus a serious breach of its contract with the libeler, and accordingly punish the libeler, who, in this instance of libel, is Richard Smith, senior systems analyst of Sharp’s enterprise device architecture, according to his email-signature.
My response, as of yet
Setting aside Sharp HealthCare’s possible legal culpability for libelous statements made against me by Richard Smith and Ingrid East-Worthy-Lindquist-Smith via Richard.Smith@sharp.com, I free-styled a response to my sister and her husband:
When my article tarnished their secret combination, Ingrid and Richard wrote a libelous email about me, via Richard.Smith@sharp.com. The email follows below, in full (I numbered the paragraphs, for easier referencing.
1. I am sending this email to all of you so there is no confusion as to what was said and where we currently stand, I suggest you read it in its entirety before attempting to reply and\or communicate with our family further. We love you and please accept this as a response to some of the voicemails, emails and text you have sent in recent days. This was written very early on the 27th of October and has slight modifications from an email received later that day, but before Ingrid and I could both reread and approve of what was written.
2. Each of you may or may not be aware of several events that have taken place over the past few weeks, through the course of Ingrid’s life, the life of our family, that of our children or my own. It is not our intent to explain all of those events, the reasons for or to make excuses. For those that might be feeling in the dark as to the reasons for this email, understand that we have made the decision to get past the point of continually explaining ‘what occurred’ and reliving certain events that took place. If we were not clear enough yet in what was just said, let me be blunter “WE WILL NOT EXPLAIN IT TO YOU, DON’T CALL, EMAIL, TEXT OR OTHERWISE ASK US.” If we wish to communicate further or discuss it more with you we will come to you ourselves. Likewise, we hope you don’t feel the uncontrollable need to bother one another about what they may or may not know. This is not to say anything negative about those that have, only to stress the point that we are moving on from it.
3. We know that not all of you share our faith, beliefs, approve of our decisions or the mistakes we have made. Those of you that have stood by us, offered your support and been in close confidential communications with us over the past week, we are eternally grateful to you and all that you have done. We hope that you will maintain our trust and continue to keep confidential anything that was shared with you.
4.As I stated, we know not all of you share our beliefs, but we know that our family, marriage and individual persons are under constant attack by the adversary, whom we call Satan. We know that he seeks to destroy our happiness, our family and our own souls. While you may not share this belief, I am sure you can recognize at the very least a happy life, a successful marriage and the rearing of children to be moral upstanding persons is as it always has been a difficult and often daily struggle.
5. At this point in our lives we have decided that it is time for our family to ‘take off the gloves’ to rid ourselves of those things we feel will be destructive to our family and ourselves. Once again, let us put it more bluntly and as clearly as I can state it. With our “gloves on”, we have tolerated Russ during the time he had possession of his two youngest children. We did so that we might ensure in our minds, that we could be there when needed to help those two children. When Russ would become too high to care for his children with the use of illegal drugs, regardless of his reason for usage, Ingrid would go get the children and care for them. Often they would spend the night at our home and under our protection. When Russ would tell Ingrid he was thinking of putting the kids up for adoption, Ingrid came to me and we discussed as a couple the possible need to adopt them and take care of them so they would at least have some family connection. While the need to adopt never became a reality, I mention this in the spirit that you understand the length and sacrifices we were willing to go in support of the welfare of those two children.
6. While we have not stopped caring for the welfare of Aden and Athena, we hope that Deb will continue to care for them, provide for them and that the courts will protect them from the influence of their birth father. We continue to maintain contact with them and will continue to do so in ways that Deb feels is safe for her and her children and pray that she continues to put them first in her life above all else.
7. With our ‘gloves still on’ we made the decision to distance ourselves from Russ, his problems and his influence. We are aware of his unhappiness with our decision to distance our family from him as he stated in his own email months ago to the family. While he cites our unhappiness was with his drug use, regardless of his physical pains, that was not the sole basis for our decision to distance our family from him and I am sure many of you can come up with your own examples of how his life has both benefited and damaged yourselves, your marriage and your families. We know Russ has done some things in Ingrid’s life that were intended to be of an aid to her, however this does not leave Ingrid, myself or our kids eternally in Russ’s debt nor does it merit continual acceptance for all the negative, hate and evil Russ has decided to inflict upon our family. For the Christian minded, I will tell you that I, Richard, personally have forgiven Russ for the actions he has taken against our family. However, as much as I love dogs, I will not allow a rabid dog anywhere near my family, and will take whatever legal means necessary to protect my family in either case.
8. Russ is the text book definition of a psychopath, his mental illness, deceptiveness and lack of remorse for his actions do not and will not continue to tear our family down nor does it excuse his behavior and actions. Let me be very clear, this is not a cute name calling or jab at Russ, he clinically is a psychopath and requires help. We’ve spent years, as we have also seen many of you and at great sacrifices to everyone in an attempt to save and rescue Russ through our own efforts. Russ is beyond anything our family can do to save him and his negative influence and mental illness would only serve to drown those that would go after him. I’ve said this before; lifeguards are often trained to let those they intend to save drown first then to have the victim bring them both down under the water killing them both. Our family does not have the medical training to assist Russ and thus will not hold out our hand any longer to pull him to shore lest we drown and are too destroyed.
9. Russ need not be a part of our lives nor be allowed to influence us in any way to receive the medical and mental assistance he requires and we can only hope that he seeks help in his own life. We do not need his remorse or require that he obtain forgiveness from us that we continue to move on with our lives. While we hope that he seeks the help he requires we are realistic in knowing he does not believe himself ill nor in need of any help.
10. For those that may be feeling this is not Christ-like, let me share this scripture with you as there are many like unto it:
11. Matt: 5:29-30: “And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.
12. And if thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.”
13. It is not my intent to get into a doctrinal debate over our current approach to the situation before us. Dealing with the evil that flows from Russ with our ‘gloves on’ has now come to an end for our family. We do mourn the loss of an eye or a hand, but never the less, we will not continue any longer to allow its destructive nature in our lives.
14. From this point forward Russ is and always will be for the remainder of our lives on this earth, cut off from our family. This is not some ‘throw out there’ statement, it is a firm stance and decision we have made. We hope that he seeks the medical and mental treatments and counseling he requires. From this point on however, we will have no direct contact, communication, support or otherwise intentional interactions with Russ.
15. It is also important that you understand, we will also no longer communicate with or have contact with those that continue to support, interact with or communicate with Russ. INCLUDING THOSE ON THIS EMAIL. (This does not include the legal requirements placed on Deb or her children if any.) We realize this means many of you still have a choice to make, but sadly some of your own interactions with Russ has continued to cause problems for our family and we will cut off the infection no matter how far down it goes and no matter how painful the cut initially will be. Please understand that we don’t need calls, voicemails or emails about how you yourselves are the victim and then going on to explain how you did or did not provide information directly or indirectly to Russ about our family.
16. While to some it may seem petty, this includes allowing Russ to remain in contact with you through facebook since fb will also allow him to view information about our family through your connection to us. It will not be enough to simply unfriend him and if you chose to ‘block’ him from fb will remain in contact with you, if not; you will be removed and blocked as of Sunday. Please understand this is not some sort of ‘threat’ and it may seem unfair, I make no statement regarding its ‘fairness’ to you or any of us. I cannot change the cards that have been dealt to any of us, but we have decided how best to move our family forward. At this point, it is no longer an option for our family and while we will not ‘hate’ or ‘disown’ you for whatever decisions you make, we simply ask that you respect our decision to cease communications with you based upon our need to remove Russ from every aspect of our lives and repair the damaged he has and will continue to cause.
17. We don’t doubt that Russ will up his efforts to destroy our family or otherwise voice his opinions in opposition to the choices that have been made and his hatred towards our family, women and society. We know that in his mental illness he will lie, decive and play the victim without remorse in an attempt to deceive others and manipulate them in a way that serves his own sick and evil purposes, this is what psychopaths do. This is exactly what Russ does, he claims to be the victimized robbed of his children and cheated on husband who falsified abuse testimony in a police report and in court only to excuse it because he was trying to ‘save’ Deb and ‘teach her a lesson’ from alleged shoplifting. He has absolutely no issues or qualms with lying to you or anyone else, straight to your face so long as it benefits his motives and anyone that stands by him is only pulled down into the lies.
18. While we understand that our continued denial of his existence or influence upon our family will most likely result in his desire to continually become more destructive towards us and we will continue to cut him from our lives and take any legal actions necessary to do so. We will no longer play into his mental illness and games, nor entertain anyone who chooses to do so.
19. I hope this has been made perfectly clear where we stand with Russ and what the decision of our family is as we move forward and work together as a family, as husband and wife and as individuals, both together and our own counseling.
20. As for Carol, let me first say that neither of us harbors any hatred towards you, Carol. However it seems that most everything of recent significance you do to try to ‘help’ the situation only serves to worsen it and I am sure you don’t mean it to, but I also know that you have seen what I am talking about. See paragraph 4 of your email from 10/27.
21. You cannot reason with a psychopath. Paragraph 4 is exactly why communication with you was terminated and why we have made the decision that anyone who wishes to continue communicating with Russ will be cut off from our lives as needed. Carol, your very question to Russ, no matter how well intended, led to you releasing confidential information in an attempt to gain an understanding of what reason a psychopath has for his actions. I won’t attempt to explain nor ask any reason why you would give Russ any information at all, or why you would not have simply disconnected your call from him at the mere mention of his writing about several past events given that he had no business even bringing it up to further his own psychotic ideals and opinions. Your email seems to display that you somehow misunderstand why communication was ended with you. Your ‘love’ for Ingrid is not in question, it is your inability to understand that you cannot reason with Russ and in doing so divulged information that was confidential. You continue to post positive messages towards his idiocies on facebook and in doing so continue to encourage ‘expressing’ himself.
22. Understand that I continue to use the phrase, psychopath to describe Russ and his mental illness not as a name calling, but with utmost seriousness. The man is mentally ill and as such is unpredictable and a danger both physically and emotionally to our family and has become the preverbal rabid dog I speak of.
23. Carol, I don’t know if you realize it but almost every communication you have emailed or left begin with statements prefacing how you should be viewed as the victim yourself. Please, think twice before you speak or email or text our family. Don’t begin your conversations with Ingrid or anyone else about how you’re the victim of anything and then attempt to explain how XYZ was not your fault. As nicely as I can say it, prefacing a call about how none of your children call you ever and then going on about noticing how you now notice Ingrid who would call has stopped calling is not helpful, nor trying to explain how what you may or may not have given Russ information does not help. Nor does it help, if it be true or not, to go on about how it must have been Ingrid to give Russ any information. It is not helping!
24. Carol, again, as nicely as I can put it, STOP trying to help. STOP calling, texting, emailing and leaving voice messages to Ingrid or for our family, you’re not helping. If you continue to do so, we will permanently cut you off. This is not a threat; you have a choice, back away from communicating with our family and do not continue to contact us while we work to deal with the damage that has occurred not only recently but with all the past issues. Carol, DO NOT respond to this email, do not call, do not ask others, with as much love and pleading as I can express in a written message, STEP BACK OR YOU WILL BECOME A GREATER THREAT TO THIS FAMILY AND WILL BE CUT OFF PERMANENTLY. If you continue to communicate with accept calls from or otherwise interact with Russ, there will be no need for repairs and you will be cut off from our family, do not make any mistake or misunderstanding about that.
25. I do not expect this to be easy for you, nor will I make it my problem at this moment, this is your final warning, DO NOT RESPOND TO THIS EMAIL. I expect you to be wondering around Christmas time, DO NOT SEND A CHRISTMAS CARD, PRESENTS FOR THE KIDS OR OTHERWISE INSERT YOURSELF INTO OUR LIVES BEFORE WE ARE READY TO DO SO OURSELVES. Do not ask anyone else for them to ask us what to get the kids. I don’t know what else I can write, but I am never going to be able to cover every possible excuse that might arise around the ‘but I didn’t know you meant XYZ’ and we are not going to deal with trying to cover every possible situation. DO NOT AT THIS TIME TRY TO EXPLAIN YOUR ACTIONS TO US IN ANY COMMUNICATION FORM. ALLOW US TO HEAL AND IF WE NEED IT WE WILL ASK FOR AN EXPLAINATION.
26. While I am sure you think you do, you have no idea how hard this is for Ingrid and our family to go through knowing part of the damage comes from the relationship she currently has and has had with you. It’s extremely difficult for her and our family to step away from you and leave the need to repair your relationship with Ingrid and our family aside so that we can focus more fully on our own. We hope you seek your own outside counseling to deal with whatever issues this may present for you.
27. Our goal is to heal and strengthen ourselves and our family. Our family being Ingrid, Trenton, Brelynn, Loralai and myself. That is our primary family and not to mean that I personally would not give my life for any of you or make whatever sacrifices I need to help you when needed. However I nor Ingrid can no longer do so and will not do so at the expense of ourselves and our children beyond what is reasonable and it is not to mean that we have not and do not appreciate the many sacrifices you all have made on behalf of helping our family. They key word here is reasonable sacrifice and Russ is no longer a reasonable sacrifice we are willing to make.
28. Carol, when, and I do expect there to be a ‘when’ though not any time soon, we come to a point that we are ready to heal the relationship between you and our family, we will make it know and we will reach out to you in doing so. Until then, please, please, please with all the love in the world respect what I am saying and back off.
29. I mean no disrespect in not sending this portion to you alone, but there has been way too much 2nd hand information about who feels what and how and we need to make sure everyone is on the same page with our stance and our expectations. The rest of the family needs to have a clear understanding on what stance we have taken and if you are to be cut off, there can be no excuses.
30. For the rest of you, if we have not reached out or replied to you just yet, please give us some time as we strengthen and heal ourselves. We do see your hands stretched out and while you may not have been a factor in the damaged caused sometimes taking your hand means re-visiting some of the past that still needs to be compartmentalized as to not have a continued damaging effect on our lives.
31. We love you, we know that the last few months of the year are often spent with and thinking of extended family and we expect the next few months to be a difficult but walkable path ahead of us. We pray for your understanding as we also hope you will keep us in your thoughts and prayers. It was hard enough for us to write down these words, reread them and to send them to you.
Thanks, Richard, Ingrid and Family
Rick Smith, Sr Systems Analyst
Sharp – Enterprise Device Architecture